So, this coming weekend, I have the house to myself from Saturday afternoon to Sunday afternoon.
My Olds are away from today for two weeks, leaving my sister and I to fend for ourselves. This isn’t too unusual. Normally when this happens, I’ll invite a few friends ’round – during the hey-day of my parties, I’d invite a veritable horde of people, and insanity would invariably follow – we’ll drink, dance, have some fun, then my sister (who can’t invite a few friends ’round because she has none) will get tired/jealous/drunk and decide that she either
- Wants an argument with someone for no real reason
- Wants everyone out because she’s fed up of no-one talking to her (because she walks around scowling and abusing people)
- Wants to assert authority over drunk people (including me), and turn off the music (which she doesn’t like).
All of these result in us having an argument, and depending aupon my mood, the amount of alcohol we’ve both drunk, and what weapons are to hand, result in varying levels of injury and damage. In fact, the only damage that was caused at my last shindig was caused when my sister demanded we turn off the music immediately, despite my protestations that there were three tracks left on the album (Up The Bracket, by The Libertines – one of the greatest albums ever) and that after that we didn; want to hear any more music. I nearly lost a little finger tha night, and spent the following afternoon scrubbing blood from the ceiling and walls!
But this saturday, my Sister will be out from saturday afternoon ’til sunday afternoon! So the house will only have me and my dog – Chucky – in it! Aimée is being dragged up to Norwich to visit her Olds, so she can’t even be there, which prompts to think “Well, the weather is supposed to be good, I have the house – sounds like Pimms O’clock! Er, I mean, sounds like BBQ Party!”
So, I get on the phone, and start texting people… only to discover it’s a friends birthday pub/club crawl on Saturday. which means that a large swahe of people I invited can’t make it. Then a handful of others are away or have previous plans… And everyone complains that there’s not enough house parties any more, and I never have any gatherings – and when I do, no-one can bloody make it!
Fecking typical.
On the plus side of life, my Bran Flakes diet is starting to pay dividends – the jeans I’m wearing today were uncomfortable, to say the least the last time I wore them (it was these jeans that made me realise I was about to bust out of a 32″ waist, and spurred me into this diet!), and today they’re quite comfortable! The blandness of breakfast, and the sweat sweated during my workouts is now that much more tolerable
TTFN
